Who am i?

Who am I? three little words, should be easy to answer, isn’t it, after all it’s about me, and who knows me better.

I stood in front of the mirror, looking at myself, looking for my identity, finding something which makes me different and unique.

Do I define myself with my relationships, the roles I play? Then I am a mother, a wife, a daughter, a sister, a friend… a Coach.

Am I an amalgamation of all my achievements, my career goals, my hobbies, the milestones I have reached in my life? Does that give me a sense of satisfaction or makes me a failure if I have unfulfilled dreams? In that case I am an Engineer and MBA, with 20 years of corporate experience; wondering if this was my intended path, where life has taken me compared to my peers who are at their respective pinnacles.

Is my identity defined by my upbringing, my roots, my value systems and beliefs, some of it which was forced on me in my childhood and some of it I adapted? I am an Indian Bengali, with a very liberal upbringing and a happy well-loved childhood. I am deeply passionate about people, their experiences, their conversations, and their stories.

Should the answer be different depending on who is asking, what the context is? Afterall I am a different person in a professional setup vs in a school meeting vs in a pottery studio.

Should I ask people in my life who are close to me, who I am? Will their answer be enough, and correct?

Is our identity an all-encompassing system of memories, experiences, feelings, thoughts, relationships, and values that define who each of us is?

Am I the same person I was in my childhood, in my twenties, 5 years back , last month, yesterday? After all aren’t we constantly changing, evolving, growing?

Can I really ever know who I am? Will there ever be any answer which will ever satisfy me?

The quest for who you are is a never-ending journey and maybe I will have answers one day. For now, I would instead ask myself, am I who I want to be?